You are doing the work and showing up to life despite the hardship. That is a huge part of the battle that you are winning daily.
Keep going towards God in everything. Try to ask yourself what in your life / day is taking you away from God and what is bringing you closer to God. What is a distraction away from your reliance on God? What are you trying to use in place of reliance on God? How are you relying on self instead of God? Where are you still fighting, refusing to accept, trying to swim upstream? How can you instead practice gratitude and acceptance - even of the hardship and pain - and lean into it as a way to get closer to the God within you? Can you hunt your pain and surrender into the process of being healed instead of fight against it / run from it? What would that look like?
These all strike me as things to meditate on.